Florida

Every morning while we're eating breakfast, my father asks me what's for dinner that evening and I have a tiny meltdown cause I don't know what to tell him.  Last night we finished off the leftovers in the frig and so tonight I'm making the chicken I took out yesterday.  My friend Jen told me to of COURSE make BBQ chicken (because it will become BBQ chicken anyway), but I think I'm gonna switch it up and fry the breasts.  I'm sure my mother never fries chicken, as it is too fattening - but I'm gonna go out on a limb and fry them.  Actually, my father is so skinny, he needs fattening up.  His legs look like 2 skeleton bones - a lot like Sponge Bob Square Pants.  He looks a lot like that.  Or really what Sponge Bob will look like when he's 83...

Speaking of breasts, it is SO embarrassing watching a movie with my dad and then a sexual or inappropriate scene comes on the screen.  We both look at each other and start talking at once, "Uh, what did you, uh, think of Mom today," or, "Uh, boy was it hot today."  ANYTHING to take your attention away from the tv for that moment.  When it passes, we go back to watching the movie, like it never happened.

We didn't go see my mom today.  My dad was too tired, and I have to admit, I was too.  It was her suggestion that we stay home today, and so we did.  My dad falls asleep in "his" chair all during the day and sometimes I stop and stare at him to make sure he's still breathing.  He actually sleeps all the time in his chair - he hasn't slept in his bed for over 15 years, because it's too hard for him to lay down and get up from that position.  His chair is motorized to lay down and sit back up to make it easier for him.

The bugs and rodents here are incredibly annoying.  I know God made all creatures, but I have yet to discover the purpose of mosquitoes.  There are armies of mosquitoes here, especially after the sun goes down.  If I happen to be out at night, I run, or rather waddle quickly, back into the house to avoid these creatures.  In fact, when we went to the hospital the other day, inside the first door was a bug zapper on the wall!  They try to zap the little guys before they enter the second door.  How smart is that!

There are these little lizards that crawl all around the pool screen, that gross me out.  In fact, one of them drowned in the pool last week and my dad had to come to my rescue to get the little critter out of the pool.  He took a long pole with a net on the end, scooped him up and laid him out to dry and shrivel up.  Disgusting.

In addition to these little ceatures, there are alligators in the canal, directly in back of my father's house.  Believe it or not, stupid people stand on the banks and fish or throw bread into the water.  I've heard that alligators can run up to 35 mph, so I don't go anywhere near the canal.  If the alligators don't get you, there are also poisonous snakes in the water.  With all of this, plus the heat and humidity, WHY would anyone want to move down here??  Well, tons of old people, that's who.  They're everywhere - especially on the golf courses.  There's a golf course right across the way, next to the canal.  I really don't think an old person can outrun an alligator.  But then maybe when you become old, this stuff doesn't bother you any longer.  I don't know.  But I guess I haven't reached that age yet...