Beginning the Journey -- A Little Late...

After a week of living back with my parents, at the age of 55-almost-56, I decided to write a "Blog," for a daily diversion and sense of reason - and for anyone who wishes to read along. Writing has always been a great outlet for me, and so with laptop in hand, I begin.

After the past few years, my health has continually spiraled downward and I finally decided to file for disability through the job I work for. To obtain this, I had to be off of work for at least 6 weeks, and so I'm using all the sick and vacation time I have built up over 24 years, and am now on leave of absence. I sent my application in for disability and am awaiting their response.

At the same time, my parents have also spiraled downward, as my mother broke both of her hips (within a few months) and my father is basically helpless alone. They are both 83. I felt a great tug on my heart to go down to Florida (where they live) and help them as long as I can.

And so that is what I've done. I'm here in Florida, living with my father, as my mother is still in rehab, slowly healing - taking care of him and visiting my mother. Interestingly, my parents and I have never been close, but that is changing slowly. Actually, I was the "black sheep" as a teenager and young person and I owned that title until just recently. Now, I am actually the "Chosen One" among my brothers and I. It's all very funny and shows you how your life can turn on a dime, as they say. It surely can.

The title of my Blog refers to the fact that I am SURROUNDED by old people. They are all around me! At first it was a little unnerving, but I'm beginning to settle in and accept it as my current reality. After all, I wasn't born yesterday. And it makes it worse that I use a cane, because they nod at me and smile as if to say, "Oh yes, my dear, we do understand..." I guess they really do.

Anyway, I wish I would have started this the first day I arrived, as there have been some interesting, funny and sad things to happen this past week. Rosemary Hopkins, mother to my good friend David Reninger, passed away. She was my mother's best friend when we all lived in Chicago, and one of the sweetest and funniest ladies I know. It's always a reality check when someone dies. My father became angry and cursed when I told him and my mother just sighed. It simply made me sad.

The nursing/rehab center is an interesting place. Last night when my dad and I were there, we had entertainment by a lady in the hallway that was singing Broadway show tunes and humming when she forgot the words. There were 3 of these ladies sitting in the middle of the hall talking REALLY loud and singing and making no sense. It was hard to ignore them, and I kind of enjoyed it really. They were happy, so it didn't matter to them that they weren't making sense; they made sense to each other.

Tonight, my mother wasn't doing very well. She has an infection where her incision is and lost a lot of blood for some reason. She has a fever, which I am attributing to the infection and she's on antibiotics. Her doctor can't see her until Friday, which is irritating to me. She has to wait 2 days in this condition. I've noticed that alot here - the doctors don't seem to rush to get you in. I left her sleeping as she was real tired. She looked so small, old and vulnerable in that bed...not the tall and strong woman who raised me...